21 Comments
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Katie Rouse's avatar

This was such a beautiful read, Allison! I really struggle to ask for help / receive help, but this reminds me how worthy we all are to ask and give and be with others. Thank you for the reminders. I'll be hanging onto this piece.

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Allison Kirkland's avatar

Thank you so much for reading and for taking the time to let me know that it resonated with you, Katie! Indeed, we are all worthy.

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Mia Brabham Nolan's avatar

This one really got me right in the heart. I feel softer and happier for reading this. Especially the ending, oh my goodness, I’m cheesing. Thank you for your gift, Allison❣️

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Allison Kirkland's avatar

Thank you so much Mia! I had a lot of fun writing it. I'm glad it made you smile.

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Jaime Ortiz's avatar

Love this! Helps hearing your perspective (even when my kids are waking you up!) 🤣

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Allison Kirkland's avatar

It's the best and cutest morning alarm I could ever ask for!

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Rebekah Taussig's avatar

This picture of togetherness resonates so deeply! I think we all suffer (in ways I think we're only now just beginning to recognize) from a culture that has long revered independence and scorned dependence. I think often of the way Sara Hendren describes the comments she received from people about have two more children after her first son was born with Down syndrome. People seemed critical of her choice, saying her younger two kids would be burdened with their oldest brother's care after she and her husband passed away. And her response was that obligation to one another is a gift. That is life giving. That is community. Your essay gives a picture of such a sturdy web of giving/receiving care. I think living together this way bolsters all parties beyond what we can fathom. Thank you for your beautiful writing! I always want to move slowly through your words, soaking them up🙏

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Allison Kirkland's avatar

I love this anecdote from Sara Hendren. I have been meaning to read her work for awhile, and you've motivated me to do that sooner rather than later!

One of my nondisabled friends read this essay and pointed out something I hadn't seen. She said that the ending made her think about the added intimacy that Paul and I are able to experience that nondisabled couples might not get to share. I hadn't thought of that before, but she was exactly right.

I am still in awe that Rebekah Taussig reads my writing! It means a lot. Thank you.

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Adam Hollowell's avatar

Beautiful! And so well crafted. Love it - thanks for writing.

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Allison Kirkland's avatar

Thanks for reading and taking the time to comment, Adam!

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Elizabeth M. Johnson (she/her)'s avatar

This is my favorite piece of yours so far, Allison. Every part of it delivered me to a place where I could both nod and say "yes" and also feel a fraction of what it's like to be you. I love to be in that (rare) space.

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Allison Kirkland's avatar

Thank you so much, Elizabeth! It definitely felt vulnerable to write, but I truly believe that vulnerability is always worth it.

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Susan's avatar

Beautiful, Allison! And glad you got to enjoy Finding Your Roots :) It’s one of my favorites

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Allison Kirkland's avatar

I'm totally addicted to it now! Gotta love PBS.

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AnnaH's avatar

What a wonderful read. Thanks for sharing.

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Allison Kirkland's avatar

Thank you so much Anna!

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Jenn G's avatar

This piece really resonated with me today, Allison. Thank you. We all carry challenges, visible or not—lest we dare pretend we don’t (and in doing so, probably carry something even heavier). Thank you for sharing so bravely, and for helping me feel safe to do the same today. <3

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Allison Kirkland's avatar

I'm so glad to know that it resonated, Jenn. It's true that hiding our needs does seem to make them even heavier. What a good reminder, especially these days. Thank you so much for reading and taking the time to leave this thoughtful comment.

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Kristin Fellows's avatar

How could I not heart this?! 🥰

"“I love cutting your food,” he said, as he looked up and caught my eye, smiling. “It makes me feel like we are really sharing every part of the meal.”

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Allison Kirkland's avatar

Aww, thank you Kristin! I appreciate that you read it and even took the time to write this thoughtful comment.

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Kristin Fellows's avatar

Of course! I appreciate intelligent and thoughtful writing. And this was especially sweet. ☺️

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